LET'S TALK ABOUT SEX | Lust on Lexapro: Navigating Sex on SSRIs
The use of Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitors (SSRIs) and other antidepressants has increased dramatically since 2020, especially among students. Whether this rise is due to the pandemic, social media influence, the woke left agenda or other debated contributing factors, more young people are turning to SSRIs than ever before, and it's time to talk about their role in our sex lives: These inhibitors also tend to inhibit orgasms.
I must begin with a disclaimer: I am writing about sex and antidepressants from the perspective of a cis woman who has experience being sexually active on SSRIs. While I hope my work resonates with a broader audience, everyone’s experience with sex and mental health medication is unique.
It is no secret that SSRIs, along with all their pros, come with a slew of nasty side effects that can make finding your perfect prescription a stressful and lengthy journey. One of the least discussed yet most common side effects is sexual dysfunction, including loss of libido (no sex drive), difficulty reaching orgasm (can’t quite get off) and impotency (floppy penis). All of which is particularly inconvenient because SSRIs are depression alleviant, but there is nothing quite as depressing as not being able to have sex when you want to. See the dilemma here?
Why does this happen?
The sexual side effects of SSRIs rear their head because, by blocking the reuptake of serotonin, the medications can also cause an increase in serotonin that affects hormones and neurotransmitters — particularly testosterone and dopamine — critical to regulating sexual activity. In simpler terms, while SSRIs are trying to make your brain happier, they can inadvertently fuck with the part of it that tells your body it’s time to get turned on and/or orgasm.
What’s the solution?
When I began my journey with mental health medication, I was lucky to work with a doctor who was transparent about the potential sexual side effects of SSRIs. She made it clear that the first medication one tries may not be the right fit and that it can take a few attempts to find what works. That said, side effects are wildly underdiscussed, and not everyone is lucky enough to have access to an attentive provider who discusses them.
This brings me to my first piece of advice: If you try a new SSRI – or any new medication – and experience side effects, communicate with your doctor. There is a good chance the drug simply isn’t right for you and that another path may be better. But your provider can’t help you if they don’t know what’s going on. Even if the only side effect is sexual, it’s still worth mentioning. Sexuality is a crucial ingredient for quality of life, and prolonged sexual frustration can lead to depression, which kind of defeats the whole purpose of being on an SSRI.
If exploring other paths isn’t an option for you, fear not; there are other ways to embrace getting zesty on Zoloft. First, lowering your dosage (with approval from your provider) can help minimize side effects while upholding the therapeutic benefits of a drug. Another trick is “scheduling sex,” which is not nearly as awful as it sounds. Since SSRIs can affect your body differently depending on the time of day, it’s worth experimenting — solo or with a partner — to figure out when your sex drive is most present or when you have an easier time finishing. Once you’ve figured out your own body clock, it can be easier for you and your partners to know when it’s a good time to get it on. You can even plan what time you take your meds based on when you’d like to have sex. Maybe you’re a limp lover at dawn but a powerful Prozac pounder by dusk — you won’t know how to turn Lexapro to Sexapro unless you test the timing.
Finally, it is never a bad idea to see a therapist. Sexual frustration is just that: frustrating. Rather than let it snowball into shame or avoidance, put your cards on the table. A good therapist can help you untangle everything that’s going on — mentally, emotionally, chemically — and guide you towards a sex life that copulates alongside your Celexa, not in spite of it.
The mental health crisis of the 21st century is not going anywhere, and everyone deserves to have their individual needs met. Simultaneously, everyone deserves to pursue the sex life they desire. These two goals are not mutually exclusive, but finding your “chemical romance” often requires extra communication, self-awareness, and a willingness to try something new.
So, next time you feel like you must choose between your Paxil or an orgasm, remember: It is possible to be both happy and horny.